May 16th, 2004

Question about Sheila Jeffries' book...

I'm reading "Unpacking Queer Politics" right now, because it has been discussed so much all over the place. Parts of it are resonating, parts of it are a bit infuriating. Anyways, one thing I am finding just plain odd and confusing is her rhetorical treatment (thus far) of bisexuals. On the one hand it's like bisexuals don't exist (nothing new there!) It's just Good Lesbians (feminists of a certain stripe), Bad Lesbians (the pierced, butch/femme ones), gay men, and Straights. But on the other hand, every once and a while she will say something is Really Bad and see, bisexuals are involved and That Seals It! And I am just like huh, what? When was that little Bi Is Bad, QED thrown into the mix? She has whole chapters saying what is wrong with gay men. A huge section on what is wrong with FTMs. But nothing--and I scoured the index--detailing just WHAT precisely bothers her about bisexuals!!! And it is really, really bugging me.

I mean it's weird but I would take it a LOT less personally if she would just out and say what is (politically or otherwise) allegedly wrong with bisexuals, or bisexual inclusion in gay and lesbian groups and activism.

Anyone out there have an idea? Or even anyone else here who has read the book so we could compare notes?

(Crossposted with my blog.)

Introduction and request for thoughts

Hey all:

I've been checking in on this community for a few days and it seems like almost all the posts are really thoughtful, open-hearted and useful. I don't have a tiara but I do have a tutu!

So like y'all I have multiple identities that do or do not always work well. I'm bisexual, femme-ish, a bdsm switch, a more or less-nontrans girlfag who is content identifying as a girl ---except in gay bars and in bed with femmey boys, etc. etc. But perhaps the weirdest thing about me in the circles I move in is that I'm monogamous. Once you're my S.O., our lovelife is more or less just us.

I learned a lot from The Ethical Slut, I have poly exes and friends, and I consider myself a polyamory ally. That said, I'd like to meet/learn from/share experiences with some monogamous radical queers, as well as open a discussion about monogamy as a life choice, not just an outdated, oppressive norm.

Have a beautiful Sunday everyone-