I know this isn't a femme-specific community, but since there are several femmes here with perspectives on their way of being that I appreciate, I'm asking for assistance from you the one way I know how. Please forgive me if this pushes any buttons for any of you. And I've looked at some of the femme-related communities on LJ and honestly felt as if this question would get a better hearing here. Too many of those were either insanely low-traffic or looked like personal ad communities.
At risk of sounding like a self-help book for the terminally stupid, I am in search of good resources for understanding femme as a source of power and self-empowerment. I've been using a soft butch motif as a form of hiding myself and hiding from myself for a long time, and it's been driven home to me recently that I need to stop. I need to accept the idea that putting my personal form of beauty on display in the way that suits it (that being more femme than I've been letting it be) isn't going to negate my strength. It's not the entire picture for me, but it's part of the whole.
I just got Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers on Game Boy Advance. I already have the Game Cube version but now I have both. In the game cube version, you can only play some of the men. Not that there are many female characters. I was psyched to see I could play Eowin (the blond female who had a chush on Aragorn the king). I have been thinking of this. I wonder why I get excited with the idea of playing a female character. She is weaker, of cource, and she only looks different than the men. I wonder what is so segnificant about her being a woman...one thing is for sure though, I have always been like this. I was always excited to see females in movies and programs, although I didn't always apreciate the way they were portrayed...anyway, my question would be, why should this be segnificant?
Post-queer. So does that mean there is no longer a "team" of Gays and Lesbians? Was there ever one? Where are you on the vertical vs horizontal power axis? Do you support queers/post-queers just cuz? Is it, "hey, get out of the fricken way [regardless]? Somewhere in btwn?
ok. a flamboyantly post-queer stranger does something you don't like & wouldn't like anyone to do (low but annoying on the shit happens scale - eg, disagrees with you on a pet subject, does a fender scratch or has a pet peeve, eg. is chirpy & chatty at 8am & you have to go to work w/ a headache...whatever). A one time thing, nothing like repeatedly playing the stereo too loud, just a random quick incident. How do you react?
A. Be patient but direct as you would w/ anyone
B. Be patient but direct as they are a cool kid just like you.
C. Bitch slap them as you would w/ anyone
D. Publicly, be a political ally, but later be certain other queers know they deserve a bitch slap.
E. Share the cookies that you never leave home without.
So, I've had mixed feelings about gender-neutral pronouns for a while. Does it make sense to create language to describe something? How important are words? Can words really convey identity anyway? The end result has been that I use them if someone requests them, but otherwise, I stick to more conventional pronouns for folk who like those, or the much-debated-about-grammatical-correctness "they" for folk I don't know.
But suddenly, I've found myself wanting more! What's a gender-neutral way to address someone in the first person? Specific example: I'm writing a cover letter to someone who cannot be described as "Professor" "Doctor" or "Queen". Sometimes, I'll guiltily make a gender assumption based on name to come up with a "Mr" or "Ms". Other times, there's no specific person I'm addressing, so I can stick with the completely neutral "To Whom It May Concern". What if here's a name that isn't conventionally gendered, but you want something more personal as a greeting? What then?